KAAFI RANDOM: NOVEMBER SESSION

Nostalgia is a nice place to be. And it happens to you. Any person is just not capable to be in state of 'nostalgia' on their own. It is something that demands your attention even if  it is just for a bit and this is something out of your control. It can come from anything,  a place your were once at or a person or a situation that you randomly find yourself into (this can act as a trigger as well) for example being one upped by a kid or a photograph or a bygone souvenir or anything else-- basically anything living or non-living can act as a potential nostalgia trigger. 

Of late I find myself getting nostalgic quiet often and this will probably increase in future. I think as we grow this feeling grows with us too, becoming that warm cozy safe and comfortable space for us to escape. I think it is a nice escape afterall. Opinions may differ on this but I find this state a blissful state. In that moment when I find myself musing about the time gone, I find myself smiling (or laughing as well that makes it awkward), sharing small anectode (most of the times it is retelling of same stories), comparing the present with the past and just being jolly self for that period of time. The thing that truly surprises me is myself and how fast the time is gone, I mean it is always 'I cannot beleive I was like that!' or 'Was it really me?!!' or 'Has it really been that many years?' etc. Does that happen with others as well? Maybe,maybe not, I don't know. Brain surely is a funny thing. It's like it has a personality of its own which is not yet comprehended, it's functioning is yet to be fully studied and I feel it is purposely delaying that, it doesn't want us to fully know it yet! Likes to play Uno reverse the moment anyone thinks they have figured it out.

Incase you did not figure out, I was talking about our funny little organ (not so little) the Brain! in those last couple of sentences. If you knew then ignore this. That is thing about writing under a assumed name or a pen name there is a level of assured anonymity, a 'Who this might be?' kind of thing. I imagine myself as having control. If you smiled post reading whatever I wrote here I won't know or maybe you cringed a little that too I won't get to know! You get the point right!?. No I am not a writer neither I potray myself as one but yes I do acknowledge that I am pretty decent at it. Sometimes even surprising myself as well when something turns out even moderately good. Why am I on a nostalgic trip suddenly? I happened to see old childhood photographs of me and my people and people who I happened to know at one point of time. Its funny just how many people we get to meet and interact! for good or bad or anything and with all of them there's this bond that is formed. Maybe bond might not be the correct word more like with everyone that we meet and interact, there is this automatic data entry in our Cerebral cortex (little showing off I am a medical graduate you see!). 

I just have lot to talk. I can honestly go on and on over any given topic, how long you might ask but even I do not know that yet! It depends on many things like the person I am with or how the conversation is going or is there really a space for me to speak as well or maybe just my mood! I like to listen as well that too without zoning out!. Only thing is if you are going to talk let's say about something or anything I am going to ask questions (will ask permission of course before interrupting or sometimes will wait for you to finish. Depends really!). Am I being obnoxious here? as I am constantly talking about myself! Okay maybe a little. It is fine you know. But if practised in moderation. Afterall you have got to be your own best friend and showing off your best friend is good. This whole blog thing is kind of small talk as well.

I went off track again. Yes nostalgia. Day before yesterday I happened to read 'Cop and the Anthem' and 'The Gift of Magi' by O.Henry ;these are short stories more about them some other time. The point being post reading them, I went back to my time as a school girl when I had first read them as part of our curriculum. Then one thing lead to another and another hour was kind of wasted on this whole going backwards in time thing. Not that I have regrets.That was one example of how it is smallest and simplest of things which take us back to that rabbit hole called 'down the memory lane'.

I think the most present I have ever seen someone be will be my Cat. She is called Mishti. All of 10 years old and I have always seen her being present in the moment. She lives the 'taking one day at a time' effortlessly, every single day. It is almost as if her system deletes whatever happened yesterday and resets every morning. As I am typing this she is presently taking evening siesta before waking up which will be any moment again for the play time. All of 3 months old when we brought her home, she was a stray cat living off on streets, she has since then adopted us!. It is as if the past has been long forgotten and present is being lived fully and a whole new personality unlocked. She is a indoor cat. Still anxious sometimes of going out or when she sees a suitcase being packed but she manages. Do you also think your pet is a person with their own secret language and with their own unique personality or are you normal? 

Deepawali just went by. Festivals are my favorite thing. I am automatically at my best on festivals. I even wait for them the whole year. That is the reason October and November are my favorite months.The winter is just coming in, it is neither too warm nor too cold and everyday seems like an extended weekend. It is in the air you know. Not to sound all intellectual and everything but everything becomes slow paced, good natured and relaxed! The spirit of festivites makes you connect with the friends long lost, that acquaintance long forgotten, those catchups which were overdue and those whatsapp groups which were made long ago becomes active again and just like that a massive giant wave of nostalgia takes everyone down to the memory lane! Even if do not wish to but these months have their own way of making you feel intensely and extremely warm and happy, to the point that you might explode with all the happiness. It is almost equal to being hugged by your favorite person, all day and every single day!

No none of it was an exaggeration.

Maybe that is what is making me go on and on. I am kind of all over the place with so many things that goes on inside my mind these are just a glimpse of that. I think this is the point where I should stop because anything post this will be same things said in a different way and when that happens things which were not making any sense to begin with, become even more of a lost cause.

That will be all for this month's episode of blabber. Hope you had a good time with everything these months have to offer.

Go make that call which is overdue.

Go hug that friend tightest.

Happy holidays.

Until next time.

  

[BOOK REVIEW]: THE No.1 LADIES' DETECTIVE AGENCY

 

'The No.1 Ladies Detective Agency' by Alexander McCall Smith is a crime fiction. This is book 1 of the series which follows the life and journey of Mma Ramotswe who is the protagonist of the book. If you are a beignner looking out for an easy to read crime fiction, then I would recommend you to give this book a chance. It is easy to read, easy to follow with not so complex sentences used to frame the narrative. 

Now about the book:

The book follows life and journey of Mma Precious Ramotswe who is our main character. She is native of Botswana who wants to open a detective agency with the inheritence she has received from her father. Her main idea behind starting this detective agency is to help women in her area to find out about their cheating/missing husbands but as the story progesses you will find how Mma Ramotswe, as she is addressed in the book along with her assistant Mma Makutsi (Mma being the term they use in Botswana to address woman) ends up helping not just women but most of the people in and around. The city of Gaborone which is the capital city of Botswana where this detective agency is based is also described as a character along with Mma Ramotswe who is through and through patriot which she learnt from her father who previously worked in diamond mines under colonial rule.

Mma Ramotswe is someone who is strong, level headed ,opinionated and has strong sense of self, which is uncommon for a woman around her; as she has been born and brought up in a society which is strictly patriarchial. She is not your streotypical detective who is slick/smart/genius type, on the contrary she is someone who is not so extraoridinarily genius but uses her common sense, intuition and compassion to solve the cases. In the background you will also get to know her own story, of growing up in her village with a doting father, Obed Ramotswe who teaches her how to count her cattles and keeps telling her how she is smarter than most boys around, about her abusive husband whom she married against her father's wishes, a painful abortion and lastly being abandoned by her husband which eventually led her to decide to never marry again and how she ends up finding the companionship in kind and caring J.L.B Matekoni. Her journey from being ridiculed by everyone (mostly men) to being number one (and only one) female detective is heartwarming. 

This book might not be the thriller that gives you adrenaline rush but nonetheless manages to keep you intrested and engaged throughout. The stories are simple, set in rural backdrop with the challenges faced by people as the basis of cases which the main character solves. The book is subtle in giving insights on friendships, love for your community, for your people and defying gender roles that are forced upon women and has many 'oh! that was touching' moments and that is it. Simplicity is why I will suggest you to go for this book.

That is all for now. I will leave this review with these two quotes by Precious Ramotswe which I liked among many others in the book!

'It is important to keep a sense of perspective'.

'When you are with somebody you love the smallest smallest things become important'.

Hope the review helped.

Until next one. Happy reading! 

KAAFI RANDOM : OCTOBER SESSION

It's been a while since I reviewed the last book! Does it also happens with you that you were kind off above average in writing during your school days but now as you moved past your school self, suddenly you do not know how to do that anymore!?? Or for that matter has it become difficult to hold on to those favourite hobbies of yours?? Happens with me as well quite often. Another thing I find myself into is being super critical of myself. I have been told that happens with most of the adults as they enter into 20's. In all honesty, I sat with the laptop with an intent of writing another review of a book which was read a while back but seeing how and where the words are going at the moment, I sort off would like to go with the flow and will see how far I can go with all this random 'bakar' . So yes continuing with what I mentioned earlier, there are quiet a few things that I find not relatable between the person I was in school and the kind of person that I am now. Guess this what is called adulting. 

I was 26 maybe 25 years old when I first read the word 'Adulting', on instagram obviuosly. (so late! I know right!! and no not exaggerating at all!!) I initially thought this might be the word to describe a certain feeling , you know how there's always a word for everything nowadays! it doesn't even have to sound like a word. Definition of words has also changed (maybe will keep changing) with time is what I think. For example, you can smell a word, can touch a word better still get an instant image of what is being described to you! for instant take a word 'gooey'! I hope you get a picture because halfway into writing it I am realising what a sorry job I am doing with all that explaining. I mean I knew what I wanted to say, what sort of examples I wanted to use, but obviously when I need something my Brain decides to open a new tab with no context whatsoever and when I want it to go to that particular tab which opened itself at wrong time again, it's time for a whole new tab!!! So on and so forth. In short now there are so many words even the ones that actually do not make any sense but convey exactly what you wanted to all the same.

So yup I got distracted earlier but yes I thought adulting is a feeling, like there will be some sign, an alarm like thing that will go off inside me to let me know that yup babe now you are in 'Adulting' mode. Took me time to realise nope it is something entirely different, sort of a process and nobody knows what they are doing, they just do with whatever they know. This is something that you absolutely cannot escape nor there is any 'How to do adulting' manual available. Wish there was one!! I for one believes that the older generation cannot be blamed as well. I mean, I think it is pretty much unfair to them. Because if everyone's doing what they know the best then how do we know who did the best? As in what I wanted to say here was we can always look upto them as an example, in guidance sort of way and then find our own way of winging it. This might sound like it but no not coming in defense of the previous generation nor I want to sound all cocky that I belong to priviledged class of people who have nice set of parents/elders. (You never know who you are offending so it is good to be on the safe side! also anything bad is bad be it habbits or parents/elders and that is something entirely different). I am of the opinion that nobody can right someone's wrong and all that can be done is learning and unlearning in order to figure out what is the better way.

As you grow old you realise there is not clear cut definition of  most of the things that happen to us. Everything is subjective. What is trivial for you for instance, might mean something super important to others and vice versa. There is nothing absolute, everything is in grey area, every person that we interact becomes neither this nor that, little bit of everything like 'jaljeera'. We start to notice things, many things sometimes acutely to the point of overthinking and sometimes we fail to do the same. Random thoughts starts taking shape!Thoughts regarding self-worth, subconscious mind and other random things for instance. 

Another word that they use is 'Maturity' and this too like many other things is not age bound. I have met 10 years old who seem more mature that 50-60 years old. Might seem like I am pushing a propaganda but I personally belive that apart from basic sense and baseline maturity nothing else should be expected from people in their 20's and 30' as we are still in the process of eveolving, learing and unlearning. We are still in the process of figuring out what makes sense and what doesn't so yes please excuse us (sincere request).

Everything comes slowly, then all at once, things start to make sense, clarity starts to come after a brain fog/mind block and somehow we eventually manage. Everyday starts becoming easier, tolerable and acheiveable. We start finding time for old hobbies again. Joy in simple things and also in small and sweet things are found again. Coversations become do able. We find our people. Priorities starts taking shape. Boundaries are being formed again.Taking everything with a pinch of salt starts to make sense. Everything starts to fall in a routine. Pressure, stress, anxiety, fear of going from one day to another continue to lurk in bylanes but become manageable. Thoughts become coherant. Sleep becomes better. Habits starts to improve. The list of 'how things are starting to make sense' is endless but yeah you get the point. The light at the end of tunnel starts to become visible.

I guess even though it took me a while but now I know how and what (even though in bits and pieces) of what this 'Adulting' stuff is anyway. I am not an expert or anything but I do know this for a fact that if joy can be found in smallest and simplest of things, then similarly taking that one step, no matter how small it is towards that one thing that takes you closer to that light is a feat, an acheivement itself. Go pat your back! 

That will be all I guess. I will get going for now. I now want to eat something. Happens always after every thought dump. It is nice sometimes, maybe better this way for writing here or otherwise journaling is the only thing that gives me control (I sort of feel it always), there's no one interrupting or piggyback on my thought. Anyways even I did not know today will be so random. Next time there will definitely be a book review. 

Hope I did not confuse you!

Until next time.   

[BOOK REVIEW] THE YEAR OF MIRACLES: Recipes about love+ grief+ growing things

The Year of Miracles by Ella Risbridger is a book that I chanced upon, you know how you accidentally come across something you did not know you needed but then realise 'oh! where was it all this time?'. I think this'll be my answer incase anyone asked me to describe this one in one line! 

This book is about how the protagonist who has hit rock bottom navigates her life, one recipe at a time. It is not essentially your regular cook book  rather I would say she has used food to express her emotions, the various cycles of mood that she goes through, about how sometimes the entire process of fixing your meal all by yourself can be the catharsis you need, even though you are not exceptionally good at it. For example, how on some days 'Daal Chawal' is the therapy you need. It also talks about how accepting grief/sadness is the first step towards managing it and it is okay to not have it all figured out. About how it is okay to sometimes slip up but to not be condescending to oneself when that happens. The protagonist goes from having a very bad year to having a year when she learns to take care of herself, goes around making friends to finally making peace with herself. All of this with a recipe at the end of it. The recipes are those having simple steps mostly with the things you have in your fridge! 

That pretty much is the gist of what it is about. Now if you are someone who is not much into traditional self help books but at the same time wants to read a book which tells you how to fix your life and is an easy read then you should go with this one. This book, according to me was like a friend who takes your hand and guides you through. To me, this was a warm gentle hug in all the right places. Exactly what Dr. Sean Maguire was to Will Hunting! (you will get the reference if incase you have watched 'Good Will Hunting'). All in all the book does not disappoint.

 What really worked for me was realistic account that the author writes on how to go about your life while dealing with grief at the same time. Author makes sure to keep it simple and write it in a way which is easier to read and comprehend. It is neither too fast paced nor too slow paced. As a first time non fiction book reader this makes a good read. I think I will be looking forward to reading more of non fictions similar to this in future.  

Hope this review helps. That will be all for the time being.

Until next review. Happy reading:)

GREETINGS FROM BAO!

ABOUT THE BABE BEHIND THIS PAGE

They say it's all about the first impressions, so going by this saying even though I am personally not aligned with all the talks regarding how first impressions are the last ones etc etc I wanted you to know little bit about the person behind this page.So let's begin!! (I promise i'll keep it short:')

The Bao of this page is a 28 year old medical graduate who wants to be so many thigs at once and wants to do so many things as well! I like reading books with fiction being the preferance and crime/horror/fantasy being the favourite genres. I like watching movies particularly easy breezy roms and slice of life cinemas,korean dramas and ghibli movies. With all said and done Tarak Mehta Ka Ooltah Chashma is undisputed guilty pleasure!!!💓💓

Coffee,Cats,Photography and Mountains are other things I love apart from my people. Opening a bookstore with cafe attached and to be in mountains are the things that I aspire to do. 'How are you as a person?' is something that I do not know how to answer properly (yet) but somehow I know exactly what is it in my brain! (you get me right?). Cooking is something that I have learnt recently and kitchen is now my safe space apart from library.

Anyhow! welcome to the page about which I thought about in 2020 but ended up creating 4 years later! This will be more likely about the books I read; my opinion about it and the places I have been to which will have me showing of photography skills and talking about my experiences.

Happy to have you here as I figure things out and get a hang of this whole process.

Hope all of it to be worthwhile.💓