Nostalgia is a nice place to be. And it happens to you. Any person is just not capable to be in state of 'nostalgia' on their own. It is something that demands your attention even if it is just for a bit and this is something out of your control. It can come from anything, a place your were once at or a person or a situation that you randomly find yourself into (this can act as a trigger as well) for example being one upped by a kid or a photograph or a bygone souvenir or anything else-- basically anything living or non-living can act as a potential nostalgia trigger.
Of late I find myself getting nostalgic quiet often and this will probably increase in future. I think as we grow this feeling grows with us too, becoming that warm cozy safe and comfortable space for us to escape. I think it is a nice escape afterall. Opinions may differ on this but I find this state a blissful state. In that moment when I find myself musing about the time gone, I find myself smiling (or laughing as well that makes it awkward), sharing small anectode (most of the times it is retelling of same stories), comparing the present with the past and just being jolly self for that period of time. The thing that truly surprises me is myself and how fast the time is gone, I mean it is always 'I cannot beleive I was like that!' or 'Was it really me?!!' or 'Has it really been that many years?' etc. Does that happen with others as well? Maybe,maybe not, I don't know. Brain surely is a funny thing. It's like it has a personality of its own which is not yet comprehended, it's functioning is yet to be fully studied and I feel it is purposely delaying that, it doesn't want us to fully know it yet! Likes to play Uno reverse the moment anyone thinks they have figured it out.
Incase you did not figure out, I was talking about our funny little organ (not so little) the Brain! in those last couple of sentences. If you knew then ignore this. That is thing about writing under a assumed name or a pen name there is a level of assured anonymity, a 'Who this might be?' kind of thing. I imagine myself as having control. If you smiled post reading whatever I wrote here I won't know or maybe you cringed a little that too I won't get to know! You get the point right!?. No I am not a writer neither I potray myself as one but yes I do acknowledge that I am pretty decent at it. Sometimes even surprising myself as well when something turns out even moderately good. Why am I on a nostalgic trip suddenly? I happened to see old childhood photographs of me and my people and people who I happened to know at one point of time. Its funny just how many people we get to meet and interact! for good or bad or anything and with all of them there's this bond that is formed. Maybe bond might not be the correct word more like with everyone that we meet and interact, there is this automatic data entry in our Cerebral cortex (little showing off I am a medical graduate you see!).
I just have lot to talk. I can honestly go on and on over any given topic, how long you might ask but even I do not know that yet! It depends on many things like the person I am with or how the conversation is going or is there really a space for me to speak as well or maybe just my mood! I like to listen as well that too without zoning out!. Only thing is if you are going to talk let's say about something or anything I am going to ask questions (will ask permission of course before interrupting or sometimes will wait for you to finish. Depends really!). Am I being obnoxious here? as I am constantly talking about myself! Okay maybe a little. It is fine you know. But if practised in moderation. Afterall you have got to be your own best friend and showing off your best friend is good. This whole blog thing is kind of small talk as well.
I went off track again. Yes nostalgia. Day before yesterday I happened to read 'Cop and the Anthem' and 'The Gift of Magi' by O.Henry ;these are short stories more about them some other time. The point being post reading them, I went back to my time as a school girl when I had first read them as part of our curriculum. Then one thing lead to another and another hour was kind of wasted on this whole going backwards in time thing. Not that I have regrets.That was one example of how it is smallest and simplest of things which take us back to that rabbit hole called 'down the memory lane'.
I think the most present I have ever seen someone be will be my Cat. She is called Mishti. All of 10 years old and I have always seen her being present in the moment. She lives the 'taking one day at a time' effortlessly, every single day. It is almost as if her system deletes whatever happened yesterday and resets every morning. As I am typing this she is presently taking evening siesta before waking up which will be any moment again for the play time. All of 3 months old when we brought her home, she was a stray cat living off on streets, she has since then adopted us!. It is as if the past has been long forgotten and present is being lived fully and a whole new personality unlocked. She is a indoor cat. Still anxious sometimes of going out or when she sees a suitcase being packed but she manages. Do you also think your pet is a person with their own secret language and with their own unique personality or are you normal?
Deepawali just went by. Festivals are my favorite thing. I am automatically at my best on festivals. I even wait for them the whole year. That is the reason October and November are my favorite months.The winter is just coming in, it is neither too warm nor too cold and everyday seems like an extended weekend. It is in the air you know. Not to sound all intellectual and everything but everything becomes slow paced, good natured and relaxed! The spirit of festivites makes you connect with the friends long lost, that acquaintance long forgotten, those catchups which were overdue and those whatsapp groups which were made long ago becomes active again and just like that a massive giant wave of nostalgia takes everyone down to the memory lane! Even if do not wish to but these months have their own way of making you feel intensely and extremely warm and happy, to the point that you might explode with all the happiness. It is almost equal to being hugged by your favorite person, all day and every single day!
No none of it was an exaggeration.
Maybe that is what is making me go on and on. I am kind of all over the place with so many things that goes on inside my mind these are just a glimpse of that. I think this is the point where I should stop because anything post this will be same things said in a different way and when that happens things which were not making any sense to begin with, become even more of a lost cause.
That will be all for this month's episode of blabber. Hope you had a good time with everything these months have to offer.
Go make that call which is overdue.
Go hug that friend tightest.
Happy holidays.
Until next time.
Thanks for the session, keep them coming!!
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